So full of anxiety and worry. About everything that I feel at least partly responsible for. Everything feels like it is up to me. ALL of it, everything is my fault when it goes bad and when good things do happen it’s never my doing. It’s how I feel.
Not all the time. Sometimes I feel all hippy, flowy, whoooosh mannnnn. Like it is all good, the planets have aligned and we are all slowly transcending to another plane, a plane of awesome enlightenment.
But not that often. Mostly I worry. Worry bad, worry about things like putting too much laundry soap in the washer, if my fish are depressed, if I put on the wrong socks will it ruin my next day(no I am not making that up). I can full on anxiety attacks because there are too many people in walmart.
I spend (what I think is) too much time worrying about things. I base this on my past, and what other people seem to act like.